real life

(or something close to it...)

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

It's all relative...

Today is the day after my worst 4th of July holiday on record. My friend John told me that he didn't want to see me anymore. The reasons I will not go into here... Needless to say, I felt like I was broadsided by a car. We were supposed to walk in Valley Forge park yesterday and then get some dinner. Well, it didn't work out that way.

20 minutes after I got to his place, I was back in my car driving home. I tried seeing if a few of my friends were at home. Well, they weren't. It's a national holiday... I can't blame them that they weren't home to comfort me. It's been a long, long time since I felt so lonely. I didn't come back to my house right away... I drove for another 60 miles with no place in particular to go. I thought about going to the movies... but knew that wouldn't really cheer me up. I finally came home and sat and cried for the rest of the evening.

I did call him last night and we talked for about an hour. He said he would call me again on Friday. We weren't even dating. He never said "Les, you're my girlfriend." I never assumed that he was my boyfriend. How much more this would have hurt were we an "official" couple! I just never want to hurt like this again.

I titled this post "it's all relative"... I did this because as I type this I think of my friend Katy. Her dad died on Saturday. Her holiday has been anything but fun and light and cheerful. In the scheme of things what happened to me was not a big deal compared to what is happening in Katy's world.

God is still God... I don't understand why some things happen. He knows. He knows the outcome of all of this in my life. There is a line in one of my favorite Matt Redman songs... "He gives and takes away. He gives and takes away." I don't know why this had to be this way... but I will continue to trust in the Lord... because he truly does know what is best for me.


  • At 11:29 AM, Blogger michelle & jamie said…

    I am so sad to read this post!!! Call me if you want to talk about anything!!!!

  • At 6:53 AM, Anonymous Patrick Young said…

    Aaargh! There should be federal laws about not breaking up with anyone in the vicinity of a holiday.

    Speaking of relative, my 'girl friend' was totally MIA on the fourth. No phone calls or anything. I took Dodger for a walk on the beach and didn't bother with fireworks.

    On her behalf, she was mid-move. She said she accidentally packed her cell phone, which in my mind is like packing my car keys, wallet, or head.

    Sorry things are ouchy for you!


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